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Rio's Diaries
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DATE: 28th October 2005
watta gwan? big up all youz hedz, dis is a message from da main man rio, to all man u fanz, ballers and playaz. just wanna say- keep it real, aye! ya gets me? now, me has gotta lotta stick from da united fan massive, yeah? but me just wanna say-
dont hate me 4 da contract dat me got
me still rio from da block
me dont earn a little
but how much i forgot
me still rio fram da block
iiight! big up all youz northern hedz. now, me gotta run, me gotz to go practise me peckham darncehall movez. hollah back all me peeps fram da world of da football
laterz, ayeeee!
Picture Competition Winner: Whit Lane Red
DATE: 31st October 2005
..watta gwarn? yo, dis is rio ferdinand, da main man, ya get me? me just want to big up da man u massive, n say dont worry for da chelsea game, yeah? i got a plan, so everyting irie, yeah? what me gonna do, yeah, is buy a big bag of ching from one of me main boyz, n den before chelsea game me gonna share it out amongst da chelsea playaz n everyting, so when we play dem dey will be propa high n we will win. yeah? ya gets me?
hollah!
DATE: 2nd November 2005
YO! How is everybody today? dis iz me- da main man- reo furdnan. me just watta give a shout out to the man u massive. now some of youz may remember that brian mcclair used to do a diary in da united magazine in de old dayz. well now me gotta do the same here, cos da gaffa (carlos) has told me i needz to get better in touch wiv you- da fanz. originally i said "whatever! heres me living like tony soprano, and dem living like tony da tiger!" but then keano said he'd give me another dead arm if i didnt do it, so then i sucked my teeth at him...
raas!
...anyway yeah, listen yeah, today we are in paris. some peeps call it gay paris, but i dont know if thats true. one fing i never knew abouts paris was dat its proper good for fashun and ting. but i hav seen all da bestest makes and labels over here - nike, burberry, even lacost! bookah!! bookah!!
now, some of da ladz have been to see some gal in paris today at some place called da loovrah. her name is moaning lisa or suttin, and she normally got a man call leonardo. but i said to the ladz, i said, "listen yeah, we's in da paris, yeah? a city of proper culture and ting. today me - reo - is gonna look at some art. today i is gonna go see the picture from allo allo- da fallen madonna wid da big b00bies! yeah! innit?!" dey all laughed, but dey aint manz of da world like wot reo iz, innit?
on dis trip, i gots to be room-mates wiv roy keane. now, roy is my main mandem. he remind me of my favourite character from a wicked book - mr angry from da mr men. roy aint laidback like reo though, but he still mek me laugh when he talk in dat father ted voice!
dis iz how bad roy is though- he catches beez, like buzzy bumble beez and that, and then gives dem to peoplez. he keepz shouting at me "wanna bee?! wanna bee?!" also i think he knows about the time i knicked peter ridzdales credit card, bcoz he keepz shouting at me "fraud! fraud!" as well.
roy iz a top guy though. i wish he'd stop giving me beats though. he gave me a dead arm and a dead leg after the middlesboro game, it proper hurt!
anywayz, laterz yeah? watta gwarn?
i'm off to go listen to fiddy on my ipod..
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